When It All Goes Out Of Control

Not everything is in our control. Some days just do as they like with no reference to the owner… Take my past few days, for instance. My normal day is wake, shower, breakfast and blog. Once past that routine I feel as though I have been set free. That’s not quite true – I still work. I am attached to an engineering company. Either they think I’m pretty good or the boss never looks at my date of birth when he prepares the monthly pay slips – may he never look. I am the bidding man; when we are invited to bid, it is I who prepares the figures. I work from home, firmly connected to the office by computer, telephone, Skype, fax and a couple of nerve ends. My workday starts at about nine and ends when the work is done.

It is exhausting work, always under pressure and always required in an impossible time frame. A couple of hours at the computer sends me running to the couch to gather strength for the next round. I enjoy the challenge of cutting prices to make sure we get the job, but I hate the pressure and panic atmosphere that goes with the work. I guess I have outgrown it all and prefer to work at my own pace. As I’ve aged so I have grown slower in my thinking, although I reckon my thinking is as good as it ever was. The other problem is that I am out of touch with the engineering industry. A retirement home deals in other subjects.

But I work and every day I hope and pray that the office will call and ask me for some vital piece of information only I can provide. So it is in the interests of a couple of giant projects – and the monthly check – that blogging has to step aside.

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