Remind Me Why We Live In a Retirement Home

Many things became clear to me today. Art, our neighbor on the sixth floor of this retirement home, celebrated his 81st birthday, a respectable score in any game. We and another couple on the same floor were invited to Art’s birthday party, to be held at his daughter’s home in a nearby town. A barbecue, we were warned and we went hungry. I drove the 20 odd kilometers with our friends in the back and we followed directions given by Art’s wife.

Kilometer 8: Did you switch off the air-conditioning? Oh, I forgot. Not important, the apartment will be nice and cool when we get home.

Kilometer 15: Did you switch off the TV, you were watching that stupid car racing? Silence.

Okay, here’s the town. Where do we turn? The first time she called she said the first circle to the left. Then she called again said it was the third circle to the right. Choose.

Back seat: This is the second circle. Go back.

I missed a circle?

Okay, here’s the third circle. Turn left.

She said right.

Can you see a right here? Go left.


Inside the house the party is in full swing, people milling about with glasses in their hands. Art is the center of attraction and enjoying his moment. His wife comes over.

“Hi everyone, how nice to see you all. Did you bring the meat?”


“What meat was that?”

“I left it in the freezer.”

“Oh, that meat?”

“Where is it?”

“In the freezer, like you said.”

“Never mind, we have other meat.”


The food was great, there was plenty of meat and we had a wonderful time helping Art celebrate. Happy birthday again, Art.

“Which way do we go when we leave here? Left or right?

And I thought it was only keys and glasses that got lost!


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